How do I know when I'm in love?

Often times, love enters our lives without us searching for it. It might even surprise you to find affection for someone else stirring in your heart. When you grow in a relationship, you might even be eager to jump into marriage before knowing all you should about yourself and being in love. There are three questions you should ask yourself to uncover if you are truly in love.

 

1. Does the person you love make you want to be a better version of yourself?

A partnership should make both people stronger. With that in mind, if you are in love, you will scrutinize the kind of person you are. It’s natural to want to show your partner the best version of yourself. You might try to be more patient, more open, more giving. That evolution of your better self happens when you are in love. 

 

2. When you think of the future, are they in it?

When life is going well, planning for the future can be fun. It’s even better when you are doing it with someone you want to share that time with. Are you making plans with the person you love? Not just dates or romantic weekends away, but solid aspirations. When you think of marriage, children, and the other major events you have on the horizon, what role does your partner play? It the answer is not one at all, you aren’t in love. 

 

3. Are their priorities and dreams becoming yours as well?

A relationship is made up of two different people with different experiences who come together with mutual feelings. Those feelings mean more than love. You’re not in love if you haven’t had a melding of each other’s principles. A relationship needs to have a common belief structure. The partner’s dreams should become yours and their priorities should blend with yours to create a shared belief system.

Even if you aren’t in love now, it doesn’t mean that your time won’t come. Being in love is one of the greatest, most complicated, and most incredible relationships you will have. Now that you know what to look for to know you are in love, it will be that much easier to spot when it enters your life. 

 

T.D. Jakes is a charismatic leader, visionary, provocative thinking, entrepreneur and compassion humanitarian with a voice that has reverberated from the world's most prominent stages. His look at life comes from the perspective of a father, a student, a pastor and a friend. His daytime talk show will be premiering this fall across the nation.

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